Help wanted!

Ok! here I go! I seriously need help. No, not that kind, I have a good psychiatrist. His name is Stan. I'm not sure if this is a good idea, but, I'm, asking, for someone I can hire to help me with my blog. PLEASE, PLEASE, HELP ME! HELP ME! (I love the beetles) I am asking for applicants who can 1.)Make an account 2.)Post daily pictures 3.)Fix any technical errors 4.)Write an occasional blog 5.)Take occasional Pictures (not the Daily Cody, that might be hard) 6.)Help decide on new games, blog ideas, gimmicks, colors, and all pictures usually. All you have to do is the following steps: 1.)make an account. You can do this first, or wait on it if you only want one if you get the job. 2.) Make a resume. Say why you think I should choose you, put your best ideas for posts, put a few pictures you've taken so I know what your work looks like, say why you'd want this position, put in the name of your favorite song, draw a picture of a platypus and scan it in, and make it look nice :<). Put in all the requirements, I will still accept them if they are missing pictures you've taken and a platypus. I will not accept if you are missing any other requirements. I sound like a teacher or scary boss. 3.)Email that thing to me. My email is julia.wittenberg@comcast.net (if anybody who isn't one of my friends and/or great regulars of my blog, I will throw a rabid capybara through your window. I will know who you are, and were you live). ONLY SEND BY EMAIL OR SNAIL MAIL OR BY PIGEON! DO NOT SEND BY COMMENT!!! I will reject them and forget it forever. Make sure you get it to me by 8:30 on November 20th 4.)Wait until November 21st. Then, if you get the job, I will send you an email with all of my pictures I have, instructions on how to do your new job (yes, it is possible), and anything else you may need. Anybody who applied for the job and did not get it, I will send you a special prize saying thank you for wanting to help me out. Don't worry, I won't make a big whoop-de doo about whoever got the job. I'll just say who they are, and thats all. Don't worry.  I know how it feels.

I really need your guys' help on this I'm in over my head! And the job may not be fun, or needed after awhile. Everything needs to happen ON TIME. I need resumes as soon as possible and by NOVEMBER 20TH. Many will enter but only one will win. HELP!  Don't worry, there will be an actual blog soon...